PHILOSOPHY OF HAPPINESS

 

 A THEORETICAL AND PRACTICAL EXAMINATION BY MARTIN JANELLO

disturbances run

through her fairest complexion

i speak but she is not here with me

 

 

 

afraid to force fate

he fails to call

until it's too late

 

 

 

the girl who stopped my heart

when she stepped off the train

has me walking her car

in dreams ghostlike in vain

one day she might be mine

when i travel back in time

 

 

 

she distanced herself

before he withdrew

or caused love enough

to hurt her

 

 

 

the prettiest girl i had ever met

sent signals to me she could be had

i didn’t hold back but could hardly be

life had not blossomed me yet

 

 

 

she does not know you

and still carries chills

from past disappointments

with also a man

 

 

 

he could not believe

he did not kiss her back

having reserved his love for so long

 

 

 

when you are

there is no me

when i am

there is no you

the universe planned our separation

we still can imagine our love

 

 

 

he frantically tried

slipping back into dream

to meet the love of his life

 

 

 

after she tells him

that he's a joke

he still does not abandon all hope

since women assert

in matters of love

the attraction of men

who make them laugh

 

 

 

she spoke softly

another language

though she knew

i was not of her tribe

kissed my neck

and rushed away

saving me

from her sanguine bite

 

 

 

k she muttered

when he announced

how thrilled he was to meet her

 

 

 

she acts as if he were invisible

so she won’t get caught in his gaze

 

 

 

he thought he could read her

by captions of similar stories

 

 

 

she brashly called herself a diva

ugliest beauty i ever met

 

 

 

stripped of all self-respect

he had no regard

for those who loved him either

 

 

 

take me she begged

since she had decided

she did not want herself anymore

 

 

 

don't think of me

as latent lover

consider us more

like sister and brother

that is the only way

we can be friends

 

 

 

how many she baits

with shallow tackle

only got worse

in the digital sphere

 

 

 

bad fortune would have it

they missed each other

colliding instead

with some other saps

 

 

 

last time he checked

he still did not like her

but will keep sampling

at least few more times

 

 

 

focused so much

on those who won't love us

neglecting to see

the ones who do

engrossed so deeply

in those we care for

failing to mind

who else needs our love

 

 

 

i plan on being happy one day

she said not including me

 

 

 

accept some love

will never happen

 

 

 

she tried and tried again and again

then grasping the meaning of never

some elements have to stay apart

that once were united at the start

 

 

 

She made men compete for her like she was a grand prize. Predictably, the one who finally won her sought revenge for his humiliation.

 

 

 

love me

nerves flesh blood heart

wanted to scream

but she fell silent seeing no use

 

 

 

i got away

with one blue eye

you don't want to see

the other guy

who's living with her now

 

 

 

i’ve always loved you

the saddest words

when they come as a surprise

 

 

 

i try to remember

her name or face

yet all that remains

is her gentle demeanor

 

 

 

reunion

she says you could have had me

still not the kind of love i want

 

 

 

go away or stay

he'll never be with you

it's almost like

he doesn't need love

at least not your kind

 

 

 

he typed he did not think

she was real

she wrote nowadays

that does not matter

 

 

 

she jealously guarded her advantages

so when i could not be with her

she pretended not to care

 

 

 

mistreats him

for reminding her

of one she loved in pain

contending with this phantom

he proves to be the same

 

 

 

you know well

she won't fall for you

still you must keep on

tirelessly hoping

 

 

 

taking a seat beside me at the bar

she tells me she's a virgo

i'm unsure how much latin she knows

 

 

 

detests him for knowing

where she had come from

blames on him pain

from irrational shame

 

 

 

between her thinking

she is too good

and his supposition

he's not good enough

they make a perfect couple

 

 

 

once deemed herself

much too dear for him

seeing him now she’s considering

fair trade for depreciating beauty

 

 

 

he used to brag

that he had had her

but she left a hook in his heart

he’s been trying to pull out ever since

 

 

 

she calls him to say

she can't talk anymore

her fiancé

won't allow male friends

 

 

 

the first sign she sent me

was plain to see

she did not care

how i take my tea

 

 

 

wandering mazes of icy sharp edges

steeling our souls and locking love in

we become contemptible wretches

for whom defrosting's an ultimate sin

 

 

 

one evening i was stuck at her flat

weather had turned unexpectedly bad

she offered me sleeping on the floor

foretelling the life i would have had

 

 

 

he was just playing

to win a friend's bet

and did not expect

to be mate checked

 

 

 

lost love letter

stamped hundred years ago

sepia emotions

still unfulfilled

 

 

 

her prettiness

cheapened by pettiness

and obstinate claims

for admiration

 

 

 

just moved-in girlfriend

despite her small size

thoroughly gives me the creep

for cutting her hair

she says otherwise

would strangle us in our sleep

 

 

 

she never answered any letters

i hoped she would know

i was too shy to send

 

 

 

her looks outdo

the beauty of her heart

a temporary problem

 

 

 

proclaims without prompting

i am not her type

as if that were to be aspired

 

 

 

walking spring forests

longing for you

walking fall forests

nothing’s come true

brace for a cold heart winter

 

 

 

first she besets him

with hints of her liking

then laughs it off

as he starts to believe

 

 

 

i met her when all else had gone

fighting two thousand miles of winter

to get to an unaffected zone

but all we found was callous sinter

collapsing she cursed me to die alone

 

 

 

tell him your dreams

none will matter a thing

he only wants to please you

so you'll be moved to please him

 

 

 

she had a great gift

for giving advice

taking it was her problem

 

 

 

wild and undomesticated

his heart tried to break

from her confining love

with every run into her fences

barbed wire ripped more shreds

 

 

 

angelic presence

apricot butt

he asked her to meet him

but she answered not

 

 

 

this was your test

she said after asking

for my opinion on animal trials

 

 

 

she starts to judge men

with a ten in her mind

then orderly scans for deductions

 

 

 

she looked to warm

her frozen hands

that's how the whole thing

got started and ends

 

 

 

he searched for love

or waited for it

depending on

which option

would not work

 

 

 

i never met her

but wondered why

she was so closed

in both directions

her melancholy moved me

romantic forsaken love

 

 

 

she called him selfish

as he admitted

he loved her most for loving him

 

 

 

he quietly waits

for permission of passion

accepting her rules of engagement

 

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8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
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© 2013-2018 BY MARTIN JANELLO

Drawing in black ink of an open daisy flower facing the viewer. The daisy is the symbol of the Philosophy of Happiness book.

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8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
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8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
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8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.
8-pronged white star with a black or yellow rhombus in each tip.