PHILOSOPHY OF HAPPINESS
A THEORETICAL AND PRACTICAL EXAMINATION BY MARTIN JANELLO
disturbances run
through her fairest complexion
i speak but she is not here with me
afraid to force fate
he fails to call
until it's too late
the girl who stopped my heart
when she stepped off the train
has me walking her car
in dreams ghostlike in vain
one day she might be mine
when i travel back in time
she distanced herself
before he withdrew
or caused love enough
to hurt her
the prettiest girl i had ever met
sent signals to me she could be had
i didn’t hold back but could hardly be
life had not blossomed me yet
she does not know you
and still carries chills
from past disappointments
with also a man
he could not believe
he did not kiss her back
having reserved his love for so long
when you are
there is no me
when i am
there is no you
the universe planned our separation
we still can imagine our love
he frantically tried
slipping back into dream
to meet the love of his life
after she tells him
that he's a joke
he still does not abandon all hope
since women assert
in matters of love
the attraction of men
who make them laugh
she spoke softly
another language
though she knew
i was not of her tribe
kissed my neck
and rushed away
saving me
from her sanguine bite
k she muttered
when he announced
how thrilled he was to meet her
she acts as if he were invisible
so she won’t get caught in his gaze
he thought he could read her
by captions of similar stories
she brashly called herself a diva
ugliest beauty i ever met
stripped of all self-respect
he had no regard
for those who loved him either
take me she begged
since she had decided
she did not want herself anymore
don't think of me
as latent lover
consider us more
like sister and brother
that is the only way
we can be friends
how many she baits
with shallow tackle
only got worse
in the digital sphere
bad fortune would have it
they missed each other
colliding instead
with some other saps
last time he checked
he still did not like her
but will keep sampling
at least few more times
focused so much
on those who won't love us
neglecting to see
the ones who do
engrossed so deeply
in those we care for
failing to mind
who else needs our love
i plan on being happy one day
she said not including me
accept some love
will never happen
she tried and tried again and again
then grasping the meaning of never
some elements have to stay apart
that once were united at the start
She made men compete for her like she was a grand prize. Predictably, the one who finally won her sought revenge for his humiliation.
love me
nerves flesh blood heart
wanted to scream
but she fell silent seeing no use
i got away
with one blue eye
you don't want to see
the other guy
who's living with her now
i’ve always loved you
the saddest words
when they come as a surprise
i try to remember
her name or face
yet all that remains
is her gentle demeanor
reunion
she says you could have had me
still not the kind of love i want
go away or stay
he'll never be with you
it's almost like
he doesn't need love
at least not your kind
he typed he did not think
she was real
she wrote nowadays
that does not matter
she jealously guarded her advantages
so when i could not be with her
she pretended not to care
mistreats him
for reminding her
of one she loved in pain
contending with this phantom
he proves to be the same
you know well
she won't fall for you
still you must keep on
tirelessly hoping
taking a seat beside me at the bar
she tells me she's a virgo
i'm unsure how much latin she knows
detests him for knowing
where she had come from
blames on him pain
from irrational shame
between her thinking
she is too good
and his supposition
he's not good enough
they make a perfect couple
once deemed herself
much too dear for him
seeing him now she’s considering
fair trade for depreciating beauty
he used to brag
that he had had her
but she left a hook in his heart
he’s been trying to pull out ever since
she calls him to say
she can't talk anymore
her fiancé
won't allow male friends
the first sign she sent me
was plain to see
she did not care
how i take my tea
wandering mazes of icy sharp edges
steeling our souls and locking love in
we become contemptible wretches
for whom defrosting's an ultimate sin
one evening i was stuck at her flat
weather had turned unexpectedly bad
she offered me sleeping on the floor
foretelling the life i would have had
he was just playing
to win a friend's bet
and did not expect
to be mate checked
lost love letter
stamped hundred years ago
sepia emotions
still unfulfilled
her prettiness
cheapened by pettiness
and obstinate claims
for admiration
just moved-in girlfriend
despite her small size
thoroughly gives me the creep
for cutting her hair
she says otherwise
would strangle us in our sleep
she never answered any letters
i hoped she would know
i was too shy to send
her looks outdo
the beauty of her heart
a temporary problem
proclaims without prompting
i am not her type
as if that were to be aspired
walking spring forests
longing for you
walking fall forests
nothing’s come true
brace for a cold heart winter
first she besets him
with hints of her liking
then laughs it off
as he starts to believe
i met her when all else had gone
fighting two thousand miles of winter
to get to an unaffected zone
but all we found was callous sinter
collapsing she cursed me to die alone
tell him your dreams
none will matter a thing
he only wants to please you
so you'll be moved to please him
she had a great gift
for giving advice
taking it was her problem
wild and undomesticated
his heart tried to break
from her confining love
with every run into her fences
barbed wire ripped more shreds
angelic presence
apricot butt
he asked her to meet him
but she answered not
this was your test
she said after asking
for my opinion on animal trials
she starts to judge men
with a ten in her mind
then orderly scans for deductions
she looked to warm
her frozen hands
that's how the whole thing
got started and ends
he searched for love
or waited for it
depending on
which option
would not work
i never met her
but wondered why
she was so closed
in both directions
her melancholy moved me
romantic forsaken love
she called him selfish
as he admitted
he loved her most for loving him
he quietly waits
for permission of passion
accepting her rules of engagement
PINE KNOWING PAIN
PHILOSOPHICAL QUOTES & POEMS
II. STILLBORN LOVE
© 2013-2018 BY MARTIN JANELLO
